Road not taken

I’ve started reading Thomas Friedman’s new book, Hot, Flat and Crowded. Here’s an interesting passage, comparing America’s history of energy consumption with Denmark’s since the early ‘70s:

Contrast this with how one small European country, Denmark, behaved after 1973. “We decided we had to become less dependent on oil,” Connie Hedegaard, Denmark’s minister for climate and energy, explained to me. “We had a huge debate on nuclear, but in 1985 we decided against it. We decided to go instead for energy efficiency and renewable energy. We decided to use taxation, so energy was made relatively expensive and therefore people had an incentive to save and do things in their homes to make them more efficient . . . It was a result of political will.”

Premium gasoline in Denmark in 2008 was about $9 a gallon. On top of that, Denmark has a CO2 tax, which it put in place in the mid-1990s to promote efficiency, even though it had discovered offshore oil by then. “When you get your electricity bill you see your CO2 tax [itemized],” the minister said. Surely all of this killed the Danish economy, right? Guess again. “Since 1981 our economy has grown 70 percent, while our energy consumption has been kept almost flat all those years,” she said. Unemployment is a little less than 2 percent. And Denmark’s early emphasis on solar and wind power, which now provide 16 percent of its total energy consumption, spawned a whole new export industry.

“It has had a positive impact on job creation,” said Hedegaard. “For example, the wind industry – it was nothing in the 1970s. Today, one third of all terrestrial wind turbines in the world come from Denmark. Industry woke up and saw that this is in our interest. To have the first-mover advantage, [when we know] the rest of the world will have to do this, will be to our benefit.” Two of the world’s most innovative manufacturers of enzymes for converting biomass to fuel – Danisco and Novozymes – also come from Denmark. “In 1973 we got 99 percent of our energy from the Middle East,” says Hedegaard. “Today it is zero.” I know: Denmark’s a small country and it is a lot easier to make change there than across a huge economy like ours. Nevertheless, it’s hard to look at Denmark and not see the road not taken.”

Every page of Friedman’s book has these kind of insights.

And what about the road not taken? After a promising period in the US of increased vehicle efficiency from 1976 to 1985, we lost the plot. Reagan rolled the effeciency standards back, slashed the budgets of alternative energy programs, let tax incentives for solar and wind start-ups lapse (several of those companies were bought by Japanese and European firms, who jumpstarted their own renewable industries). Bush the Elder made a few steps in the right direction, then abandoned efforts after the Gulf War. During the Clinton Administration, the three big automakers and the United Auto Workers brought the whole process to a grinding halt. Detroit lobbied the government to label SUVs as “light utility trucks” so they wouldn’t have to meet the 27.5 mpg for cars. Nothing much has changed during the W years . . . actually it has, for the worse. Post 9/11, rather than encouraging us to buckle down, W said, “Go shopping.” And instead of instituting a gas tax, which could’ve helped rebuild our energy and transportation infrastructure, he went for a massive tax cut, making us more dependent on China to finance our defecit and Saudi Arabia for gas. But back to the fuel efficiency thing, in 2007, the standard was ordered up to 35 mpg (where Europe and Japan are already) . . . to take effect by 2020. Twelve years from now! Give me a break. And on the addiction goes. And on the missed opportunities go.

Will the next president have the vision to reverse this losing trend? Not if they say, “Drill, baby, drill.”

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Space babe


When I was fourteen, there were two things I’d seen in magazines that I was dying to see in real life – a UFO and a naked lady. Not necessarily in that order.

With that in mind, the strange tale of Antonio Villas Boas became my ultimate fantasy.

Villas Boas was a Brazilian farmer who had what might be called a close encounter of the erotic kind. One summer night back in 1957, he was out ploughing his fields, trying to avoid the heat, when he noticed a strange red light in the sky. As it descended, he saw that it was a metallic egg-shaped spacecraft. It sprouted legs like a spider, then touched down in his field.

Terrified, Villas Boas tried to flee, but his tractor stalled. A few seconds later, he was seized by a small alien about the size of 12-year old boy. The alien wore a shiny helmet and had intense blue eyes. Helpless to resist, Villas Boas was brought aboard the craft. The alien then stripped the farmer of his clothes, and gave him a physical. This involved spreading a gel on his skin, poking and prodding him with strange instruments, then extracting blood from his chin. Throughout the exam, the alien made high-pitched barking sounds, like a puppy.

Villas Boas, still naked, was then put inside a room, whose sole piece of furniture was a cushioned examining table.

A half hour passed, then in came a second alien. The same height as the other, this one was obviously female. She was naked, with very fair skin, long silky blonde hair and wide-set feline blue eyes. Her breasts were large and round, and her pubic hair was bright red.

Without a word, she came to Villas Boas and began to stroke and caress him. She nuzzled and nipped softly at his ear. One thing led to another, and the pair forged an intergalactic union right there on the examining table. Villas Boas would later say that he had never felt so aroused in his life.

When they were done, the she-alien stood up, rubbed her belly and pointed to the sky. The message was clear. Villas Boas was to be the proud papa of a space baby.

Having performed his stud service, he was hastily dressed and escorted from the craft by the little barking alien. The craft then zoomed off into the sky.

That story was in one of my UFO Digest magazines, and I must’ve read it over a hundred times, mentally projecting myself into Villas Boas’s lucky shoes.

Not only would I get to see a UFO and a naked lady, but I’d get to have sex too. My two wishes granted, with an unfathomable bonus. I decided the cat-eyed alien girl was the perfect match for me. She was my height, she didn’t talk, and she was completely naked and ready to have sex. Unlike with the girls in my middle school, I wouldn’t have to stammer through the whole ordeal of asking her if she wanted to go to the movies or to play miniature golf. I wouldn’t have to meet her parents. I wouldn’t have to worry about what to wear. I wouldn’t have to figure out a place to take her to make out. And best, I wouldn’t have to face the impossible task of buying condoms at the drug store.

I could gladly skip the exam part, but maybe that was a necessary prelude to the sex. As for being a father at fourteen, admittedly, that would’ve been kind of weird. But then again, my offspring would be half-alien, like Mr. Spock. That would mean that he would possess all kinds of cool superpowers and advanced knowledge, which upon his return to earth someday in the future, he would share with me.

As far as I know, Antonio Villas Boas never heard from his space child or the cat-eyed vixen.

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Thomas Friedman


Here’s an interesting article by Thomas L. Friedman about
what’s at stake in this election:

Friedman article

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David


I’ll be playing guitar in David Mead’s band this Sunday, August 31st, 8pm at 3rd & Lindsley. The
show will be broadcast live on FM-100 WRLT, with David premiering songs – many of which I co-wrote -
from his fine new album Almost and Always. Come out or listen in at home!

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August


Ten things that have made the August heat bearable:

Homegrown tomatoes and fresh basil
Randy Newman – Harps and Angels
Factcheck.org
OK! The Story of Oklahoma! by Max Wilk
Mitchell & Webb radio shows
Field Music – Tones of Town
New Masters of Poster Design by John Foster
Man On Wire (documentary about Philip Petit)
Glen Campbell – Meet Glen Campbell
Simply Lemonade

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